Life

Why You May Not Like This Sex Position

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When I first started having sex, I avoided doggy style like the plague. Back then I preferred missionary and, being new to sex (and having never seen porn), I wasn't really aware that there were positions besides missionary and doggy style. I also couldn't pinpoint why I didn't like it — was it how doggy style felt or something else? I still don't know; it probably had to do with my shyness more than anything else at the time.

But as I got older and became far more sexually experienced, my feelings on doggy style changed. In other words, I converted. Studies have found that, for the most part, no matter where you go in the world, doggy style is pretty much a favorite sex position. I wouldn't say it's my most favorite, but I definitely now put it in my top three. The missionary position, however, has moved down to like number six or seven in my top 10, because of course I have a top 10 for sex positions — don't you?

Although studies have found that doggy style is commonly a favorite among both men and women, it doesn't mean it's a favorite for everyone. In fact, some people don't even like it at all, which is totally normal.

I spoke to Dr. Jennifer Caudle, Family Physician and Assistant Professor at Rowan University, about why someone may not like doggy style. Here are five reasons why that might be the case.

1

It May Not Be Very Pleasurable

Since only a very lucky few can orgasm through intercourse alone, unless you use a toy or your fingers to stimulate your clitoris, doggy style might simply feel kinda "meh." "It may not be pleasurable," Dr. Caudle tells Bustle. "Or is not as stimulating as other positions... for some, doggy style just doesn't feel as good as other positions."

If you're in the 75 to 80 percent of women who need clitoral stimulation to climax, there's a good chance you're going to prefer sex positions that focus on the clitoris, as opposed to doggy style. Granted, the G-spot (vaginal) orgasm is real — I've actually experienced one ONCE — but it still can be elusive AF. So if you want maximum clitoral stimulation during intercourse, doggy style isn't the first position that's going to come to mind.

2

It Could Be Uncomfortable

One of the things that people love about doggy style is the deep factor. It's in this position that your partner can penetrate you deeper than they can in a lot of other positions. For men who love doggy style, this is a big selling point. But while doggy style is great for women, too, in that it hits the G-spot, depending on the length of your partner's penis (or dildo), it can feel more uncomfortable than good. I've been in doggy style with some partners and have felt like my insides were were being stabbed with a spoon or something equally dull. Definitely not a good time.

3

You Want Something More Intimate

"Some women prefer to look at their partner during lovemaking because it enhances intimacy for them," says Dr. Caudle. "For this reason, some may not prefer doggy style."

Although there are ways to make doggy style more intimate, for the most part, it's more animalistic than anything else — another reason why lots of people like it. There you are, on your hands and knees, being penetrated by a partner who has most of the control, as they hold your hips and thrust themselves in and out of you. As much as that can be really hot, you can't look your partner in the eye, you can't kiss them, and that romanticism, if that's what you're looking for, isn't quite there.

4

It Could Be Related To Body Image Concerns

If you're someone who deals with body image concerns in bed, which is a common sex fear, then doggy style may be a bit of a struggle. Some of us feel uncomfortable when our ass is in our partner's face — hence the reason you won't see me in the reverse cowgirl position anytime soon.

5

It's Just Not Your Thing

"I feel that sexual positions are like personalities — everyone has a different style," says Dr. Caudle. Basically, doggy style just might not be the position for you and that's totally fine. You're under no obligation to like a specific sex position. You're also under no obligation to try to justify to someone else why you don't like a certain position.

If you don't like doggy style, for whatever reason, then so what? That's totally your business and you should never feel bad or weird about it. With so many sex positions out there, you have plenty to choose from and you'll find the ones that are right for you. Sex is about pleasure and having a good time. If there's no good time to be had in doggy style for you, then don't do it. End of story.