Instead of going through the motions and spending a lot of money on a dinner in a restaurant that's so crowded you can't even hear each other, consider a sexy Valentine's Day idea this year instead. One that doesn't require a reservation and one that isn't going to fade into a dozen other unremarkable Valentine's Days passed.
Though it might seem like the concept of planning something sexy is antithetical to the essence of sexiness itself, a little effort will go a long way. There are plenty of activities you can plan to do with your partner that are affordable, easy, and incredibly customizable.
Whether you're into the holiday or not, Valentine's Day is a good reminder that relationships need constant attention and fine tuning. Use Feb. 14 as an opportunity to check in with your partner about your sex life, to see where there's room for praise or improvement, and celebrate your connection. Here are some sexy ideas that might inspire you.
1. Go Shopping For Sex Toys
Even if you're not in the market for a new sex toy, there's something very sexy about shopping for them with your partner. It's exciting to look at the different products and be in an environment where communicating about your sexual needs is not only warranted but encouraged. You might leave with a fun toy to play with later or you might just get turned on or have a fun conversation about sex.
2. Role Play
If you're very literally looking for a way to make your Valentine's Day more interesting this year, talk to your partner about role play. If you're both game for a little creativity in the bedroom, you can plan out your roles ahead of time so that you can actually put effort into dressing up and getting into character. Check out some fun role-play scenarios here.
3. Couple's Massage
If don't mind splurging, hire a masseuse to come to your home so that you can have a couple's massage without leaving the house. Or, if you're up for doing the work yourself, get some oils and lotions and play masseuse. You can make this extra romantic by lighting candles, burning incense and playing soft music. Go all out and make your living room look like a fancy spa so that you can enjoy a special night without leaving the house.
4. Head To The Bathhouse
Instead of going to a fancy spa where you have to be covered and quiet, head to a co-ed bathhouse where you can essentially hang out naked all evening. Imagine all of the thrilling sexual tension that will build as you steam and sauna and swim together in the nude, in public, unable to be intimate.
5. Get Your Adrenaline Going
If you're looking for a sexy Valentine's Day idea that's not on the nose, opt for an exciting activity that's not romantic at all. Think: sky diving, a trapeze class, a roller coaster, extreme sledding, getting tattoos, or horseback riding. These experiences will ensure your Valentine's Day is not only unforgettable, but also a strong bonding experience.
6. Get A Room
Sometimes all you need is a change of scenery to change the mood. Get a hotel room for the night so that there's a little bit of pressure to make the night as romantic as possible. Check out HotelTonight for last-minute, or even same-day, deals on hotels in your city. Bonus points if you can find a room with a tub for two.
7. Explore Erotica
Sometimes it can be hard to express yourself with your own words, so create an assignment in which each of you find a piece of erotica to share with each other. Whether it's a poem or a passage from a novel, find something that excites you. It's a good opportunity to learn about each other in a new way. If you'd rather listen to something together, try an app like Dipsea, which has sexy audio stories to match your mood or favorite fantasy.
8. Sext All Day
Valentine's Day is on a Friday, so to make the workday feel a bit more special or spicy, send each other flirty messages. By the time you get home to celebrate, you'll be crazy for each other and feel like you've already connected. If you're having writer's block and need some inspiration for what exactly to sext, check out some of sext ideas here.
9. Play A Sexy Game
If you're craving a night in with your partner and a bottle of wine, add some fun into the mix with a sexy game. Erotic dice, strip poker, truth or dare — the options are endless. You can also explore your fantasies with XConfessions, a swiping app by indie erotic filmmaker Erika Lust that's designed for couples to find out the sexual fantasies they're both interested in.
While it's fun to make Valentine's Day an extra sexy day, don't put too much pressure on yourself to be in the mood or for it to play out like a movie — you can try out any of these ideas any day of the year.