11 Things Your Vagina Is Trying To Tell You, If Only You'd Call Her More Often

If you want to see a true treasure of human anatomy, then look no further than the vagina. First and foremost, vaginas are a lot of fun — sure, maybe not all the time, but a decent amount of the time. Vaginas are also pretty amazing and tough. Each one is special in its own way, and although it may be the source of occasional inconvenience, I, for one, would much rather have a vagina than a penis. Having a vagina puts me in excellent company.

Although they’re part of the rest of your body, vaginas tend to do their own thing. They know how to protect themselves, clean themselves, heal themselves, and most importantly, they let you know what’s up with the rest of your body. You may not realize it, but your vagina, in one way or another, likes to keep you in the loop as to what’s going on. 

Because your vagina has its own ways of alerting you to what’s happening in your body, you should probably take a listen to what it’s trying to tell you. Here are 11 things your vagina might be trying to tell you, if only you'd call her more often. 

You Ate Asparagus

If you can't recall what you had for dinner last night, one whiff of your vagina might tell you everything you need to know. What we eat has a big effect on how our vagina smells. Things like asparagus, onions, red meat, and broccoli, among others, can make your vagina smell more pungent than usual, compared to fruit, yogurt, and wild grains that keep the pH balance of your vagina in check.

While your pee may go back to its usual smell after relieving yourself two or three times after eating asparagus, your vagina takes a bit longer. Which is totally normal!

You're Pregnant

One of the biggest signs that you're preggers is when your period is suddenly MIA and your boobs are sore as hell. But your vagina gives you more than just an absent period to let you know your pregnant. It also produces a lot more leukorrhea (that vaginal discharge you sometimes notice in your undies), because your estrogen levels are increased during pregnancy. Not to mention you're more prone to yeast infections when you're pregnant because of all that estrogen. Fun!

You're Stressed

Not only does stress take a toll on your sanity, but it also does a number on your vagina. When we're stressed out, our vagina lets us know by going into dry mode and by being more susceptible to yeast infections. When our bodies suffer an imbalance, the lactobacillus bacteria fails to keep the Candida genus (yeast) from overgrowing, leaving you with that itchy, smelly, cottage cheese situation. 

You Have an Infection

Your vagina is so focused on keeping itself (and you) healthy that whenever you have an infection it gives you a great big sign through either pain or discharge. 

A fishy-smelling discharge that is yellow, green, or gray is usually a sure indication that you have vaginosis, which can easily be treated with antibiotics. A discharge that resembles cottage cheese and accompanies some vagina itch, inside and out, means you probably have a yeast infection. A "frothy" vaginal discharge that smells of the ever so delightful scent of rotten eggs, is likely to be trichomoniasis. 

If you have any of these discharges, your vagina wants you to go to a doctor, stat. 

You’re Ovulating

When a women is ovulating, she has 30 times more vaginal discharge than she has at any other point in the month. This means there's increased wetness in the vagina, which you can both feel and see, if you choose, whenever you wipe after peeing. 

You Should Have Used a Condom

Funky smells? Discharge like you've never seen? Unexplained pain or burning? Vaginal blisters, sores, and something that looks like it's a cross between a cauliflower and barnacle? Yeah, your vagina really, really wants you to go to a gynecologist immediately. 

You're Getting Your Period

Apparently, vaginal discharge becomes more plentiful right before your period. (This is actually technically considered the first day of your period, even if you're not bleeding.) During this time, vaginas also tend to ache and be more sensitive than they are any other time of the month.

You’re Turned On

When you're aroused, your vagina usually knows it even before your brain does. Depending on the intensity of your arousal, you can feel a tingling in your vagina, an increase in blood flow to the area, and even a sopping wet crotch full of vaginal secretion in preparation for intercourse.

You Overdosed on the Carbs

Carbs, in this writer's humble opinion, are the stuff of dreams. And while diets will tell you that limiting your carbs is essential to weight loss, your vagina actually isn't a big fan of them either. I know! It's like your vagina is betraying you!

Pizza, pasta, cookies, bagels, cake, alcohol ― basically everything perfect in life ― have enough sugar in them to push your vagina into a yeast infection. It seems that all that deliciousness elevates glucose levels and makes it easier for Candida albicans to latch on to vaginal cells and not let go. It is also suggested that weakened immune systems, from which can come with lots of carb consumption, can also raise the risk of getting a yeast infection.

You're Having an Orgasm

When you're about to have an orgasm, things start moving inside. It's not just the walls of your uterus that start fluttering, but your vagina and anus, too. You can feel the pressure building in your vagina as your pelvic floor gets ready to do its thing. Once you hit that climax, all that fluttering inside transitions to straight up contractions as your vaginal muscles contract then release. 

If you experience that, along with a full body rush and vaginal tingling, then there's a good chance you've just had an orgasm! Wasn't it so nice of your vagina to let you know? 

Want more of Bustle’s Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.

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