6 Quiet & Hot Sex Positions For Stealth Sex
We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off-limits, and all askers remain anonymous. Now, on to today’s topic: the best quiet and hot sex positions for stealth sex.
Q: I live with four roommates and have an old, impossibly squeaky bed. My boyfriend is very shy and is mortified by the thought of anyone being able to hear us having sex, but it seems like every position we try makes noise. I can’t afford a new bed, but I’m going crazy waiting for the rare moments where all my roommates are gone! Do you have any recommendations for quiet sex positions?
A: Thanks for the question! Living with roommates can be quite a challenge, but you can try to see this as an opportunity to get creative. In general, you want to avoid intense thrusting positions, since they’re bound to get those bedsprings creaking. Instead, you want to look for positions that emphasize slow grinding or more subtle movements — which as it turns out, can be pretty hot.
Here are the top six sex positions for quiet, sneaky sex.
How to do it: Both of you lay on your sides, facing the same direction. This can be a tricky position to get into initially, so raise your top leg, bend over at your waist, and use your hand to guide your partner’s penis or dildo into you. Using lube will also help them slide into place more easily. From there, you can lower your leg and straighten up a bit.
Why it works: In this position, your only option for movement is to grind against each other. Since there’s no thrusting, you’re not likely to make much noise. It tends to be a more intimate, sensual, and slow position, which can be a real plus.
Variations to try: You can play around with the arrangement of your legs to change the level of tightness (your legs sandwiching your partner’s legs, your partner’s legs sandwiching yours, or alternating all of your legs). You can try bending at the waist to change the angle. This is also a good position for anal.
2. Side By Side
How to do it: Both of you lay on your sides, but facing each other. Again, that initial insertion can be a bit tricky, so raise your leg and use lube. Wrap your leg around the top of your partner’s hip and use it as leverage to pull your body closer.
Why it works: This position is similar to spooning, but creates a different angle. You’re also able to look each other in the eye as you grind against each other, so it’s a good substitute for the noisier Missionary position.
Variations to try: You can play around with the angle of your top leg, stretching it out straight or squeezing it up towards your chest. Try wrapping that leg around different areas of your partner's body, like their butt, waist, or rib cage.
How to do it: Have your partner sit cross-legged (or as close to cross-legged as they can get!). Straddle their legs and lower yourself down onto their lap, guiding their penis or dildo into you. Wrap your legs around their back, so you’re cross-legged too.
Why it works: In this position, you’re basically squeezing your bodies against each other, so there’s hardly any in-and-out movement. There’s little potential for noise, but it’s still highly erotic.
Variations to try: This is a great position for incorporating a vibrating cock ring, since you can position the vibrator right against your clitoris.
How to do it: Have one partner lay on their back. The other partner gets on top, stomach down, facing the opposite direction, so that Partner A’s feet are by Partner B’s head. You both perform oral sex on each other.
Why it works: Who says sex has to mean penetration? Oral sex is much quieter than penetrative intercourse, and can be just as pleasurable.
Variations to try: You can experiment with which partner is on the bottom and which partner is on top. You can also try laying on your sides, which can be more comfortable. If giving and receiving at the same time is too much for you, you can always try trading off.
5. In A Chair
How to do it: If your bed is too noisy, why not move over to a different piece of furniture? A sturdy chair can be amazing. Have your partner sit on the chair, then straddle them. Wrap your arms around their back or the back of the chair. Raise yourself up and down, or grind against them in slow circles.
Why it works: You’re bound to have at least one non-creaky piece of furniture in your room! Right? Hopefully.
Variations to try: It all depends on the furniture you have available. If you have an armchair, try turning around so you’re facing the same direction as your partner, like you’re giving them a lap dance. If you have a sofa or futon, try kneeling facing the back of the sofa, with your arms propped up on the backrest, and have your partner enter you from behind.
6. Doggystyle On The Floor
How to do it: Get on your hands and knees. Have your partner get on their knees and enter you from behind.
Why it works: This is another easy way to escape your bed. Most positions don’t work well on the floor because it’s just too hard of a surface to be comfortable. Doggystyle, however, can be made comfortable by throwing down your bedspread or a few pillows to protect your knees. This is also a fantastic option for anal.
Variations to try: Lower yourself down onto your elbows to change the angle of penetration. You can play around with having one partner stay still and the other partner take control of the thrusting.
Have fun — and maybe try a little WD-40 on that bed frame!
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